The Beaufort Scale measures wind speeds. Here’s my first stab at the Bonkers scale

Level, SB, 0, Sanely boring, 1, Slightly bonkers, 2, Simply bonkers, 3, Satisfyingly bonkers, 4, Serendipitously bonkers, 5, Surely bonkers, 6, So bonkers, 7, Strongly bonkers, 8, Seriously bonkers, 9, Severely bonkers, 10, Stunningly bonkers, 11, Sumptuously bonkers, 12, Supremely bonkers,

Sampled from Simply Bonkers.